Holidays. Take a moment to think about what this word brings up for you. Does the thought of taking a holiday fill you with excitement and relief? Or do you feel apprehensive about what your holiday will look like or feel like? Are you counting down the days until your time off – or are you anxious about a change of pace?
It’s okay if the word ‘holiday’ brings up a lot of stuff for you. It’s normal to have mixed emotions about taking time off, especially if you’re used to working long hours. You might feel pressure to make the most of your holiday or to relax in a certain way. Big holidays, such as Christmas, can be particularly loaded with extra emotions and expectations.
Here are some thoughts that might pop up for you:
I want to rest and recharge, but I’m not sure how to switch off.
I’m so excited to have a holiday, but I’m also exhausted.
There’s so much I want to do and experience, I’m worried I won’t fit it all in.
I think I’ve forgotten how to relax?!
The holidays still feel like work to me – just a different kind.
I’m anxious about seeing relatives.
My ideal holiday is different from my family’s. How can we all get what we want?
I’m working through the holidays. It’s the busiest time of year for me – work feels relentless.
It’s normal and understandable to have conflicting thoughts about holidays, especially in a Covid-19 world. When you step away from your normal routine, it can bring up all sorts of feelings. Please be gentle with yourself. Holidays are a time for self-compassion.
With this in mind, we’ve put together some tips for having a healing holiday. Here are some ideas to help you stop, switch off, and recharge, whether you’re working through or taking a complete break. As always, we suggest trying a few different things to find what works for you.
Looking forward to things is wonderful for mental wellbeing – it’s something Sir JK does every day as part of his daily mental health plan. However, when it comes to holidays, it helps to manage your expectations. There’s a big difference between looking forward to reading a book after dinner and looking forward to ‘two weeks of holiday bliss’.
Here’s something that might help: get specific about what you’re looking forward to about your holiday. What are some tangible ‘holiday goals’? What does ‘holiday bliss’ actually mean to you – and is it achievable? Being as specific as possible will help you avoid setting unrealistic expectations or feeling disappointed when your holiday doesn’t go to plan.
Why not create a ‘holiday goals playlist’ that you can choose from each day? Be specific, yet flexible. Here are some ideas that might help you tap into your unique version of holiday bliss:
Take a nap
Go for a swim
Read a book
Sleep in
Watch a movie in the middle of the day
Stay up late
Have a bath
Cook something delicious
Ask for help (especially if you have caregiving responsibilities)
Meet up with a friend
Do some deep breathing
Start a gratitude journal
If you can achieve at least one of your ‘holiday goals’ every day, you’re doing great! When you’re engaging in your chosen activity, try to slow down and savour each moment. Soak up this special time that’s just for you.
In our hyper-connected world, it’s more important than ever to use holidays as an opportunity to slow down. Try to leave plenty of ‘white space’ in your calendar. Give yourself time to enjoy long, leisurely meals, sleep in a little later than usual, or simply gaze out the window.
We understand this is easier said than done, especially if you’re used to running at full tilt. Awareness is a great place to start. Pay attention to any feelings that arise when you’re tempted to over-schedule your day. Remind yourself you’re worthy of rest.
You might find it helpful to repeat some of the following affirmations:
I am worthy of recovery.
It’s safe for me to rest.
I am enough.
There is plenty of time in the day.
My mind is ready to rest.
My to-do list can wait.
Rest is productive and healthy.
I am worthy because of who I am, not the things I do.
If repeating affirmations out loud feels strange to you, try writing them down or exploring your thoughts around productivity in your journal. You might also enjoy our co-founder Adam Clark’s personal reflection on the art of slowing down: Looking above the clutter of life.
There’s a lot in the world to feel serious about at the moment. It’s normal to feel worried about the future, especially about Covid-19. While some of these anxieties may stay with you throughout your holiday (and it’s okay if they do!), try to prioritise having fun as much as you can.
Having fun is excellent for your mental wellbeing because it comes with a reward: dopamine. When you’re having fun, you’ll get a dopamine boost. Dopamine is a feel-good hormone associated with satisfaction and pleasure. Prioritising fun will help dial up that feel-good factor.
Fun looks different for everyone. Some people think you have to be laughing or doing something ‘wild’ to have fun, but that’s not true. You can have just as much fun reading a book as you might body surfing.
Here are some ideas to inspire you to have fun:
Enjoy shared activities with loved ones – ideally away from screens and other tech. For example, board games, telling stories, singing or dancing together, or playing a game of backyard cricket.
Watch comedy. Holidays are a time for feel-good movies and shows – save the deep, thought-provoking dramas for later.
Do something new. This could look like trying out a new recipe in the kitchen, playing a new sport, or driving to a new destination.
Try something creative. Make art, bake cookies, build sandcastles.
Read, listen, or watch your favourite stories. Tell or write stories of your own.
It’s also worthwhile to identify what blocks you from having fun. What activities or habits make you feel stressed or anxious? Give yourself permission to remove these from your life over the holidays. For example, delete social media and email apps from your phone, avoid the endless news cycle, and tell your families which topics are a ‘no-go’ zone for you. It’s okay to take a break from talking about Covid-19 or other triggering topics.
Before you head off into the holidays, take some time to check in with what you need. What would be healing for you? What are you craving more of – and less of? Try to tune out the constant messaging about what holidays should be like and tap into what you really want. (Easier said than done, we know!)
When in doubt, manage your expectations, get specific about what holiday success looks like for you, resist the urge to overschedule, and prioritise having fun as much as you can.
It’s more than okay to take a break from the messiness of the world for a while and cocoon yourself in some holiday magic (safely, of course). You deserve it!