Dealing with people who are highly distressed, emotional or even mentally unstable is part and parcel of certain jobs.
And it’s not an easy position to be in.
Even if it’s something you have to do regularly, it still asks a lot of you each time.
Afterwards you can find yourself exhausted, overwhelmed and with a sense of powerlessness in the face of someone else’s raw grief.
When this happens - and especially if it happens often - you need a plan for your own recovery.
That means taking really good care of yourself so that you can keep on doing the things you need to do.
After this type of interaction, it’s good if you can help your brain process what you’ve just been through. Try to write down and summarise the conversation you’ve just had. Writing down your own feelings can also help you make sense of them and feel a little more in control. If there are actions you need to take from the event, make a note of those too.
Next, try to talk it over with a colleague or trusted friend who can offer you a supportive ear. Once you’ve done that, do what you can to let it go. Replaying the conversation over and over in your head won’t help! Rest assured that you’ve written your notes and talked it over and that’s enough.
Now it’s time to focus on your own self-care. It’s really important after an experience like this to top up your wellbeing levels. How? Simply by doing the stuff that makes you happy. It’s not indulgent, it’s what helps you cope.
Everyone will have different things that work for them but movement is good. Go for a walk, a bike ride, have a dance, hit the gym or whatever helps you physically shake off the stress of the day. Treat yourself with something delicious to eat, watch your favourite show, curl up with a book, take a bath, meet up with a mate - whatever it is, make sure you enjoy it and don’t feel guilty for it.
Remember, as much as you might want to, you can’t solve other people’s problems or take away their pain.
You’ve done your best and you’ll be able to manage much better if you’ve tended to your own needs too.