Why looking inward can sting
Introspection — the process of looking inward and examining your own thoughts and feelings — builds self-awareness, emotional regulation, and resilience. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.
Looking inward often means acknowledging aspects of yourself that are tender, uncertain, or afraid. Sometimes, it stings.
But it’s okay if you don’t like everything you see. You’re not supposed to. Introspection isn’t about liking every part of yourself — it’s about understanding yourself better, so you can live with more honesty and intention.
When you recognise your patterns, like how you react under stress, what you avoid, or what truly energises you, you can use this information to make healthier choices.
If it’s been awhile since you’ve looked inward, here are some gentle ways to give it a go.
You may have seen those viral social media reels built around the concept of “we listen, and we don’t judge”. This approach doesn’t just make great content — it’s also a great way to observe your thoughts and feelings. Nonjudgemental awareness helps you see emotions for what they are: temporary experiences, not personal failures.
Does the word ‘introspection’ make you think about meditating for five hours straight or booking into a silent retreat? You’re not alone if this word has a certain intensity about it for you. But introspection doesn’t have to take much time, or be that deep. You don’t need to set aside a weekend for self-reflection — simply tuning in to your feelings a few times a day is enough.
Try this: Keep a pen and paper handy. At every meal time, write down: “I am feeling…” and label the emotion. You don’t need to act on it. Simply being aware is often enough.
Feelings come and go. You are so much more than your thoughts. You are not a failure — you are having the thought that you are failing. Practice putting some distance between your feelings and your identity. Let them come and go.
Sometimes introspection can help you realise there are things about yourself that you want to change or improve upon. Perhaps you want to hone a particular skill at work, spend more time listening to your partner, or nip a habit in the bud.
When this happens, start small — and start kindly. Change born from self-awareness lasts longer than change born from self-criticism. You don’t need to reinvent yourself overnight; you just need to take one small, intentional step in the direction that feels right.